That face when I walked out of the bathroom. I saw him already naked, lying in bed leaning on his elbow, with only a corner of the blanket covering his hips and well-trained abs. I gasped silently. His natural innocent, almost Bambi look had something else in it. A bit of confusion, a bit of curiosity as if asking me “So you won’t get undressed?”.
I wasn’t sure what I really wanted. All those drinks on the rooftop that we found a secret access to had a lasting effect. A cup of tea in his hotel room later helped a bit, but we were both still distanced from reality.
“Good boy”, I smiled at him and walked closer. “I’ll just tuck you in, kiss good night and then go to my room”. Lie. I didn’t want to leave at all, that’s what I knew. I sat down on the edge of his bed, pulled the blanket up hoping to eliminate all the visual distractions. “Shall I turn the light off?”, I asked and he nodded in a consent.
I was stroking his hair in the dark for a while, then gave a kiss to his forehead still not knowing what to do next. My body was electrified from all what happened that night. City lights shimmering in the dark, us on the rooftop with our drinks after escaping the party in the night club, conversations about the values of life and insignificance of material possessions, socially defined norms and conventional moral values. About willingness to travel the world and be wherever we feel happy and find our true selves. It felt like we were looking at each other’s mirror image, with the same ideas, needs and aspirations. The more we were talking, the closer we felt emotionally and the closer we moved to each other. September night was quite chilly. And then there were flashes of moments: us looking into each other’s eyes and then me feeling the ground disappearing under my feet. Not sure if he lifted me a bit – he was much taller than me – or it was just a feeling when his lips got attached to mine. Head spin, stars mixing up with city lights, the gravity disappearing.
He curled up to me in bed and asked with the most innocent voice: “Would you stay overnight?”. “Shall I?”, I whispered back, wanting him to clench me in his strong arms and say his manly “Yes”. “Up to you”, he answered instead and I had to make a decision. All that I knew was that I wanted to hang on to that feeling I had at the rooftop. “Get under the blanket”, he suggested and when I did he cheekily asked: “So are you going to sleep with your clothes on?”. “Maybe”, I teased him a bit, but then moments later I slid off my dress.
His hands reached out to me and started travelling across my body. I did the same in return. The feel of his toned muscles and the softness of his body hair tickling my skin was driving me insane. At first he seemed quite shy, approaching my lingerie, stroking along the edge of it and then venturing back to my thighs. I was playing the same game as him, just touching and teasing him softly, but then my hand slid down along his bulging underwear. I heard his “mmmmm” and in a fraction of a second he pulled me on top of him.
My bra went off and his soft lips sucked up to one of my breasts. I was moaning, feeling his hard on poking between my thighs as I moved my bum back and forward. He groaned, squeezing my bum cheeks with his hands and pushing me even closer. I could feel my panties getting soaked. I started kissing his chest, all the way down to his belly, giving it a lick every now and again. “You drive me crazy”, he whispered as I ran the tip of my tongue along the edge of his trunks. I was so tempted to pull them down and see what they were hiding, but I was tormented with hesitation: “Should I? This feels so much different from anything else before. Do I really want to take this all the way?”
I went up, kissing him here and there getting hypnotised by the perfection of his body. Our lips joined again, exploring, biting and licking. Our bodies were rubbing against each other and I could hardly brace myself, but something was stopping me. I had a feeling he felt the same. “Maybe we shouldn’t be doing this?” I asked. “I wouldn’t want it to be one night fling.” “Neither would I”, he answered, continuing on caressing my body with his strong arms.
The next day we said goodbyes in the hallway by giving a hug to each other. He looked exactly like I saw him first in the hotel elevator the other day: innocent, with his mind being somewhere far, probably back in his country. I wasn’t sure if there would ever be any continuation of the story, but I knew that I would want to hold on to that moment when gravity disappears, stars get mixed with city lights, in temporary denial of any boundaries of reality.